After making quite a good start at the old regular blogging lark in January, things have kind of gone off the boil.
To be honest I've not been feeling ALL THAT - mentally (rather than physically) on a bit of a downer.
Christmas (seems like ages ago now) was good but really tiring. Everybody wanted to see Evie (she is GORGEOUS) so there was a lot of to-ing and fro-ing for us. And then obviously Annabel's death was quite the curve-ball.
In the weeks leading up to the break I had my final sessions of Physio AND CBT. Honestly, it felt like I was being abandoned at some kind-of existential turn-pike.
But it didn't really hit me until much later.
So I can talk a good game as far as POSITIVITY and MINDFULNESS but every now again things can bite you on the ass.
And the old fears are still there. But I know what I have to do to beat them - pushing myself to go for walks (with or without Evie), exercise, testing my bladder retention (sorry, no easy way to say it). But it's hard when the other option (do nothing) is so FRICKING EASY.
In a couple of weeks I've got another appointment with the urologist - it's taken ages to come round. So this weekend I need to fill out a voiding chart - literally measuring everything that goes in and out.
No-one told me that adult life was going to be same damn GLAMOROUS.
So I've decided to post a series of things which GENUINELY help me in all kinds of little ways.
Wooden Tea Tray (seriously)
Like most people with MS I can have problems with my balance.
I remember a short one after my diagnosis going win Emma to a little coffee house. And as she went to buy the drinks, I had one of those newly-diagnosed-person's overly-dramatic thoughts: "I'm NEVER going to be able to buy her food and/or drinks EVER AGAIN!"
Obviously now, after nearly 10 years together, there's a definite element of "I wish" but I digress.
At home I'm the morning person (you can tell because of my sunny disposition, yeah?), whereas she can not be roused without a cup of tea (with biscuits, natch). So over the years there have been many spilled brews, ruined paintwork and much early-morning gnashing-of-teeth (i.e. turning the air blue).
Cups would slide around on plastic trays so I often resorted to holding two cups in one hand, keeping one free for the stair-rail.
Until that is I got my hands on this little wooden beauty. Nice big handles for gripping. Not-too-smooth wooden surface which actually grips the things you're carrying. Plus any minor spillages get soaked into the wood.
It's a little thing. But it helps us to get the day started right.