Monday, 22 September 2014

monday evening epiphany

A sudden, not-especially profound realisation while I was doing my Rebif injection - not quite 30 seconds ago.

The train of thought went something like:

"Here we are ..."
"... injecting these drugs again..."
"... no one really knows for sure if they're helping..."
"... but at least I'm doing something..."
"... I guess it could be the wrong something??"
"... Still... Better than nothing..."
"... Huh..."
"... Isn't this how most people justify religion?"

So there you have it. My Rebismart injector really does take that long and I am a bit of a smart-arse, even when I can be pretty sure that no one can hear me. 


ADDENDUM - 23rd Sept

It might sound flippant but I realised when I was having that train-of-thought that Medical Science is now my religion (or at the very least fills the gaping void at the heart of me where religion 'should' be).

It might even be the same for you but at best it's a level of blind faith.

SOMEONE told me that doing something [in my case injecting Rebif] would slow down disease progression so I've been doing it ever since. While my relapse rate is [touches wood] pretty much the same as it ever was, I get noticeably tired and I'm a bit forgetful - but then I am very much the wrong side of 40.

Still - at least I have the option (through the twin marvels of the NHS and Medical Science) to do something about it. And it's got to be better than doing nothing, hasn't it?


swisslet said...

I know what you mean, and I've made the same decision about wanting to do SOMETHING rather than doing NOTHING .....BUT.... there's one massive difference between this and religion and it makes ALL the difference: there is some evidence, properly gathered and catalogued and double-blind trialled, scientifically rigorous evidence, that injecting ourselves like this MAY slow the progression of our MS down. It also may not. You can argue how much you believe that research, and how much difference you can really say it makes to any given individual, but it has been properly studied and checked and verified and there are properly quantifiable results and everything. You are not completely taking a step into the unknown.

You absolutely cannot say the same thing about religion. There is NO evidence to support the existence of a God. I'm pleased that faith gives people comfort, and all that, but .... y'know. Completely different.

stevedomino said...

Hi there

My blog was - if you can imagine such a thing - possibly even more flippant than normal.

I take your point - but when i chose my DMT, there WAS an element of blind faith: a qualified person told me that THIS may help my condition - i certainly didn't read all the studies and research, i took it in faith.

Yes, there's more concrete proof of its efficacy than there is proof of a God - but people with FAITH don't need proof, they just have Faith.

Similarly, my faith in medical science and the team at the QMC is such that, if they say that this is the best course of action, then ok i'll go with it.

That was all i was trying to say.

And in a lot of ways I really do envy people with Religious Faith - it would be nice to be able to trust in something bigger than us. But at the same time, i also take a great deal of comfort from the fact that all we have is NOW.

And people who say the Devil has all the best tunes need to listen to this "It's Alright" by Brother Joe May & Sister Winona Carr - i'm yet to hear anything which is so simultaneously full of dread and hope. It's powerful stuff!


swisslet said...

Sorry Steve - that came out sounding a lot more righteous than it was supposed to. I know what you mean. I inject because I'd rather do something than nothing, even though it may well actually be doing nothing for me. Placebo power maybe... but then, you can say the same thing about religion too.
It's all cool and I wasn't deliberately trying to be a dick. I promise!

swisslet said...

There's evidence that Avonex *might* be reducing the frequency of my relapses by about 20%. If there was that much evidence in the existence of God, we'd all be believers!

(please let me not be as much of a troll on this subject as Dawkins. I seem not to be able to help myself. There is a great bit in "The God Delusion" about a so-called scientific study into the power of prayer. They did a "proper" double-blind trial and everything. Funded by a religious organisation.)

stevedomino said...

I didn't think you were being a dick at all! If anything I was being a bit of a contrarian. I'm not even vaguely religious - but art and music of a spiritual bent can almost make me a believer. Similarly, I've not got a scientific bone in my body... but I gotta believe!